Feeling Stressed
Pursuing an EHCP
Annual Reviews
Local Authorities
Anxiety and Stress management for parents and guardians dealing with SEND for their child

Book a Call with ‘Chigg’

Chigg, Dip CBH, MNCH(reg)

Chigg, Dip CBH, MNCH(reg)

Founder of Bohangar City Practice and former Banking Analyst, the mission of this private practice is to transform minds through the power of Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy. Located in the heart of the city, it combines unique professional insights with therapeutic expertise to offer a holistic approach to mental well-being

5 reasons mental health support

5 Reasons Parents Need Mental Health Support During The EHCP Process: Solutions

Reading Time: 13 minutes

Content Roadmap

Navigating the EHCP process is a journey filled with challenges and triumphs, drawing from my personal journey navigating the EHCP process and my expertise in anxiety and stress therapy, this article is crafted especially for parents and guardians. Whether you’re beginning the EHCP journey or seeking a deeper understanding, here you’ll find a blend of structured guidance and heartfelt experience.

Reason 1: The Stress of Navigating the EHCP/SEND System

Challenge: The end of the start, of the beginning

The journey to secure an Education Health and Care Plan (EHCP) for a child can be long, and overwhelming. Parents often find themselves attending numerous meetings, filling out extensive paperwork, and advocating fervently for their child’s needs.

All of this can take a toll on a parent’s mental health, particularly if they feel like they are not being heard or understood, or ignored.

The Ideal vs. The Reality of the EHCP Process

The Educational Health and Care Plan (EHCP) process is undeniably crucial for children with special needs. However, for parents, especially those venturing into it for the first time, it can be a labyrinth of stress and uncertainty. Drawing on some of the collected experiences, there is an apparent gap between the EHCP, and other deliverables set out in the Send Code of Practice, as it appears on paper with the often complicated experiences many parents actually go through. In this journey, you will find a plethora of information on what guidance based on what should happen.

The problems begin only when the ‘what should be happening’ with a silent ‘in my opinion’ against a resolute set of alternative opinions and viewpoints, which may leave you pondering whether are they talking about the same child.


  • Educate yourself on the EHCP process and try to set realistic expectations. Gather where possible from others’ personal experiences, and read forums, and blog posts on the topic area. Where there are common voiced themes on delay, lack of resourcing, lack of following due process, being ignored etc., do not be so hard on yourself if you too may encounter these same characteristics
  • Seek support, move away from isolation to shared inclusion
  • Consider professional guidance or counseling to navigate the process.

Reason 2: The Identification of Needs, Are we talking about the same child?

Challenge: A Tale of Two Paths

Before diving into the EHCP process, it’s paramount to pinpoint a child’s special educational needs. On paper, this involves teachers, parents, or healthcare professionals who discern that the child might benefit from more tailored support than what’s currently provided by the school. A supported application is made to the council for an EHC needs assessment.

However, navigating the EHCP process isn’t always such a clear path. Many children navigate primary school with their specific needs either quietly met within the classroom dynamics or, regrettably, missed altogether. It’s not that these needs suddenly emerge when they transition to secondary school; rather, the primary school environment might inadvertently cater to the child without formally acknowledging their SEN. The risk here, without expert input, was the child’s needs, which have not been assessed, or actually ever met.

One parent told me their child with SEN with associated supported provisions could do calculations without paper, and quite quickly at it. The debate they had with the school, without much sway of change, was why their child was going over the same basic level of sums several years below their actual age. After the child moved on from that school they reflected that the provisions the child required were easier to implement when the academic content was low. We will never know the other side of the story a compelling viewpoint to hold, fro appeared to have been an identified and ongoing education challenge.

In my discussions with other parents, a recurring theme emerged which raised anxiety: the tangible evidence required for the EHC Needs assessment, such as schoolwork and test scores, suddenly became elusive. One parent recounted a telling experience at their child’s parent-teacher meeting. As they sifted through a stack of test papers, they realised out of 29 papers their child’s assessment was conspicuously missing. The teacher, seemingly caught off-guard, couldn’t provide the paper or even recall the score, or where the paper was. This paper, another input into the process for the EHCP process, remained mysteriously absent throughout. Fortunately, despite these hurdles and a process that felt more obstructive than supportive, their child eventually secured an EHCP. The parent reflected that the scores were eventually released a year later which provided the view that indeed year on year the child was not progressing. We have no insight from the other side, but the damage to the process was in their view a real one, and their personally held view was one of ‘obstruction’. They balanced the next school and went beyond the call of duty with their support.

It is worth making point of the duality of experiences presented, amongst the more questionable experiences there are some gems of forward-thinking teachers, TAs who are there to help all in their class and do their best under the circumstances of what from the other side may be a challenging unsupported system.

Are schools / Local Authorities institutionally wired to accommodate all in the school structure, which creates this downward pressure to keep the EHCP conspicuously just out of reach?

From my vantage point, and echoing the sentiments of many in similar situations, there’s a palpable hesitancy embedded in the system. The threshold to secure an EHCP is set high, often dauntingly so. While the intent might be to ensure resources are allocated judiciously, it sometimes misses the mark, failing to address the core of a child’s learning challenges.

Recognising these needs early is pivotal, but I have yet to meet anyone who refers to their experience using the words quick and efficient. Identifying a need is the first step in what often becomes a winding, intricate journey to ensure a child receives the education they rightfully deserve. This initial identification sets the stage for the challenges and triumphs that lie ahead.

Solution Ideas:

  • Maintain open communication with teachers and school officials, this is rule 101, but is more challenging as time goes on, and may just require seeking additional help or support.
  • Regularly document and gather evidence of your child’s needs and progress, if you cannot gain clarity from the school, what is plan b?
  • Seek external assessments if you believe the school isn’t adequately addressing your child’s needs.

Reason 3: Request for Educational Health Care Plan Needs Assessment:

Request for Assessment: After passing the first hurdle of gathering enough evidence is to formally request an EHCP assessment. This request can be initiated in a couple of ways:

  1. Through the Education Setting: Often, the school or educational institution itself, recognizing the child’s needs, will initiate the request. They’ll gather evidence from teachers’ observations, academic performance records, or other professionals who’ve interacted with the child. This evidence will support the case for an assessment.
  2. Parental Request using Section 36: If parents believe their child’s needs aren’t being adequately addressed by the school, they can make a direct request to the local authority for an EHCP assessment under Section 36 of the Children and Families Act 2014. This section allows parents (and young people themselves) to request an assessment for an EHCP. When submitting a Section 36 request, it’s crucial to provide as much evidence as possible about the child’s needs and any support they’ve received so far.

Once the request is submitted, the local authority will review the evidence presented. The outcome can be one of two:

  1. Agreement: The local authority agrees that an assessment is necessary and will proceed with the EHCP process.
  2. Refusal: The local authority might decide that there’s insufficient evidence to warrant an assessment. In such cases, parents have the right to appeal this decision, but it’s essential to be prepared with strong evidence to support the need for an EHCP.

Once a need is identified, a formal request for an EHCP assessment can be made. This request can be initiated by parents, the school, or other professionals involved in the child’s care.

Drafting the EHCP: If the assessment determines that an EHCP is needed, a draft plan is created. This draft outlines the child’s needs, the desired outcomes, and the support required to achieve those outcomes.

Finalising the Plan: Parents have the opportunity to review the draft, provide feedback, and request changes. Once all parties agree, the EHCP is finalized and implemented.

Understanding these initial steps can help parents feel more prepared and informed as they embark on the EHCP journey.

Solutions Options:

  • Familiarise yourself with the criteria the local authority uses to grant assessments. Get on top of the right way and build the evidence to challenge what you think is the wrong approach or outcome.
  • Collaborate with teachers and professionals to gather robust evidence. See the point above, often easier said than done.
  • Understand your rights, including the ability to appeal decisions. Become empowered in the process, the policy, and the law.
Therapy Good Points List 5 Reasons Parents Need Mental Health Support During The EHCP Process: Solutions

4. Impact on Siblings:

The EHCP process, while centred around the child with special educational needs, inevitably affects the entire family, including siblings. The siblings of a child undergoing the EHCP process might experience a range of emotions and challenges:

  1. Feelings of Neglect: With parents often engrossed in meetings, paperwork, and advocacy, siblings might feel left out or believe that their needs are secondary.
  2. Emotional Overwhelm: Siblings might struggle with feelings of sadness, frustration, or confusion about their brother’s or sister’s needs and the attention they receive.
  3. Desire to Help: Many siblings naturally want to support and help, but they might not know how or might feel overwhelmed by the responsibility.
  4. School and Social Impacts: Siblings might face questions from peers or feel the need to defend or explain their sibling’s condition, leading to potential social challenges.

To support siblings during this time, parents can:

  • Open Communication: Regularly check in with siblings, allowing them to express their feelings and ask questions.
  • Quality Time: Ensure they spend one-on-one time with each child, emphasizing that each child is valued and loved.
  • Educate: Help siblings understand the EHCP process and their brother’s or sister’s needs in age-appropriate terms.
  • Seek Support: Consider support groups or counseling for siblings, providing them with a safe space to process their emotions and learn coping strategies.

Solution Options

  • Maintain open communication with siblings, allowing them to express their feelings.
  • Dedicate quality time for each child, ensuring they feel valued.
  • Consider support groups, and always balance quality time out
  • Consider the concept of Special Education discussion time-out zones

5. The Emotional Toll of Raising a Child with Special Needs

Raising a child with special needs can be emotionally challenging. Parents may experience feelings of guilt, grief, and frustration as they navigate their child’s diagnosis and try to provide them with the best possible care. It’s important for parents to prioritise their mental health so they can cope with these emotions and provide their children with the support they need.

The Impact of Parental Mental Health on the Child

Parents’ mental health can have a significant impact on their child’s well-being. Children may pick up on their parent’s stress and anxiety, which can exacerbate their own feelings of anxiety or make them feel unsafe or insecure. Conversely, when parents prioritise their own mental health, they may be better able to provide their child with a sense of safety and stability.

Solution Options

  • Prioritise self-care activities such as exercise, meditation, or spending time with loved ones.
  • Seek therapy or counseling to process emotions and develop coping strategies. The Bohangar City Practice uses Cognitive Behavioural Therapy to work on rebalancing anxiety and stress levels, but there are other options
  • Engage in support groups or forums to connect with other parents in similar situations.

The Importance of Self-Care for Parents, Guardians & Caregivers

Caregivers, including parents, often neglect their own needs in order to prioritise the needs of their loved ones. However, it’s important for parents to take care of themselves so they can continue to provide the best possible care for their children. This may include engaging in self-care activities like exercise, meditation, or spending time with friends and family.

Taking Care Of Your Mental Health 5 Reasons Parents Need Mental Health Support During The EHCP Process: Solutions

The Importance of Advocating for Your Own Mental Health Needs

Parents may feel like they need to prioritise their child’s needs above their own, but it’s important for them to recognise that their own mental health needs are just as important.

This may mean advocating for their own needs in the EHCP process, seeking out support from mental health professionals, or taking time to engage in self-care activities. Resources for Parents to Support Their Mental HealthThere are many resources available to parents who are seeking support for their mental health.

These may include therapy, support groups, mindfulness practices, and self-care activities. Parents can also reach out to their child’s healthcare providers or school officials for recommendations on resources that may be available to them.

Navigating the EHCP Process: A Therapist’s Personal Insight

Why My Experience Matters

Having personally lived, navigated, and survived the Educational Health Care Plan (EHCP) process, I bring a unique perspective to therapy. This isn’t just theoretical knowledge; it’s a relatable journey that can’t be gleaned from books or videos. My experience offers:

  • Empathy and Validation: I understand the challenges, emotions, and stresses you face. This firsthand knowledge allows me to offer genuine empathy and validation during our sessions.
  • Practical Insight: Engaging with educational settings, local authorities, mediation, or SENDIST can be daunting. Whether you’re at the beginning, in the midst, or reflecting post-process, I can provide practical insights based on my own experiences.
  • Guidance Through Nuances: The EHCP process involves intricate interactions with school officials, healthcare providers, and tribunal processes. My experience can light the way, offering hope in what can sometimes feel like a solitary battle against a daunting system.

In essence, therapy with someone who has personally navigated the EHCP process can offer invaluable support, helping you remain positive, manage stress, and effectively traverse the journey.

Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy: A Tailored Approach

Session Structure: Typically spanning 8-12 sessions, I offer therapy at strategic points throughout your EHCP journey. These sessions can be conducted online or face-to-face, depending on location. I also provide flexibility with daytime and some late-night sessions to accommodate your schedule.

What It Entails: Cognitive-behavioural hypnotherapy is a fusion of cognitive-behavioural therapy and hypnosis, proven effective in alleviating stress and anxiety symptoms. For parents immersed in the EHCP process, this therapy offers:

  • Stress and Anxiety Management: Identify and replace negative thought patterns contributing to stress and anxiety. Techniques like relaxation, imagery, and cognitive restructuring are reinforced through hypnosis.
  • Building Resilience: Equip yourself with coping skills and resilience to better support your child throughout the EHCP process.
  • Prioritizing Mental Health: By focusing on your mental well-being, you’re better positioned to offer emotional support to your child, fostering a positive home environment.

In summary, Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy serves as a potent tool for parents, helping manage the stresses of the EHCP process while enhancing both personal and child well-being.


Below are some external references that can provide further insight and validation to the content discussed:

  1. EHCP Process
    • Department for Education. (2015). SEND code of practice: 0 to 25 years. Link
    • Wright, P. W. D., & Wright, P. D. (2006). From emotions to advocacy: The special education survival guide. Harbor House Law Press.
  2. Stress and Anxiety Management
    • Hofmann, S. G., Asnaani, A., Vonk, I. J., Sawyer, A. T., & Fang, A. (2012). The efficacy of cognitive behavioral therapy: A review of meta-analyses. Cognitive therapy and research, 36(5), 427-440. Link
  3. Stress and Anxiety Management
    • National Institute of Mental Health. (2019). Anxiety Disorders. Link

Disclaimer, Please Read: The information provided in this article is for illustrative and informational purposes only. It does not establish a therapist-patient relationship. For medical issues or emergencies, always consult with a licensed medical professional. For non-clinical challenges related to stress, anxiety, and other emotional or behavioural concerns, considering a consultation with a therapist may be beneficial. Bohangar City Practice is a registered Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy practice, specialising in combining cognitive behavioural techniques with hypnosis to address various challenges and promote well-being. Any questions, please do reach out

Buy Me A Coffee
0 0 votes
Article Rating
Notify of
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments

MULTI-MODAL THERAPY: Cognitive, Behavioural, Hypnotherapy, Mindfulness, etc.

THERAPIST: Former City Analyst, City of London, Singapore, Zurich, and Frankfurt. 

If you are seeking Therapy please reach out for an initial free consultation call. Bohangar Hypnotherapy Practice. Hope you enjoy this blog post, would love to hear your comments  

Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
Scroll to Top

Interested to learn more

Any Queries will drop a line, Free Consultation before booking

Sign up and get

£65 per Session