Balancing the needs of Siblings with your SEN Child

Caring for Siblings: Balancing the Needs of Your SEN Child and Their Brothers or Sisters

Christopher 'Chigg' Ba(Hons), Dip CBH, MNCH(reg)

Christopher 'Chigg' Ba(Hons), Dip CBH, MNCH(reg)

Founder:Bohangar City Practice: (ex Banking Analyst): Transforming Minds, Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy.

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Caring for a child with Special Educational Needs (SEN) is undoubtedly a rewarding but also challenging journey. One of the lesser-discussed aspects of this journey is the impact it can have on the siblings of the child with SEN. As a parent or caregiver, finding the delicate balance between meeting the unique needs of your SEN child and ensuring the emotional well-being of their brothers and sisters can be a complex endeavour. In this blog post, we will delve into the problems that can arise from personal experience and present effective solutions for striking that crucial balance.

Identifying the Problems

1. Attention Imbalance

In families with a child who has SEN, it’s common for the majority of the attention to be directed toward the child with special needs. While this is essential for their development and well-being, it can inadvertently lead to feelings of neglect and jealousy among the other siblings. They might start to feel like their needs and achievements are less significant, which can negatively impact their self-esteem.

2. Emotional Strain

Siblings of children with SEN may experience emotional strain due to witnessing their brother or sister’s struggles. They might feel a mix of empathy, frustration, confusion, and even guilt for not fully understanding the situation. Over time, this emotional turmoil can affect their mental health and their ability to cope with challenges.

3. Limited Activities

The family’s routine often revolves around the needs of the child with SEN, which can limit the activities the other siblings can engage in. Whether it’s missed social events, restricted hobbies, or limited family outings, these limitations can lead to resentment and a sense of unfairness.

4. Lack of Education

Many siblings might not fully understand their sibling’s condition, leading to misconceptions, fear, or even isolation. This lack of education about their sibling’s special needs can further alienate them from the situation and hamper their ability to provide support or advocate for their sibling.

Solutions for Balancing the Needs

Individual Time and Attention

Make a conscious effort to spend quality one-on-one time with each child, focusing solely on their interests and needs. This helps them feel valued and understood. Regularly check in with them, ask about their day, and listen attentively to their thoughts and concerns. This not only nurtures their emotional well-being but also fosters a sense of inclusivity within the family.

Open Communication

Create an environment where all family members can openly express their feelings, frustrations, and concerns. Engage in age-appropriate conversations about the sibling’s special needs, encouraging questions and addressing any misconceptions. Open communication ensures that every child’s emotional needs are acknowledged and validated.

Shared Activities

Find activities that can involve all siblings, taking into account the interests and capabilities of each child. Engaging in shared hobbies, games, or outings can foster stronger bonds among siblings and make them feel more connected as a family unit. This also reinforces the idea that everyone’s preferences are important.

Sibling Support Groups

Consider enrolling the siblings in support groups specifically designed for siblings of children with SEN. These groups provide a safe space for them to share their experiences, learn coping strategies, and connect with others who understand their situation. These interactions can help them feel less isolated and more empowered.

Educate and Involve

Take the time to educate all family members about the child’s special needs. Age-appropriate explanations can help siblings understand the challenges their brother or sister faces and develop empathy. Involving them in the caregiving process, when appropriate, can also help them feel more connected and responsible.

Seek Professional Help

If you notice signs of emotional distress or strain in any of the siblings, don’t hesitate to seek professional help. A therapist or counsellor experienced in family dynamics and special needs can provide valuable guidance and strategies for supporting the emotional well-being of all family members.


Caring for a child with SEN while nurturing the emotional needs of their siblings is a delicate balancing act. By recognizing potential problems and implementing effective solutions, families can create an environment where every child feels valued, understood, and supported. Striking this balance not only strengthens the family bond but also equips all siblings with the tools they need to navigate the complexities of life with empathy, compassion, and resilience. Remember, fostering an inclusive and supportive family dynamic is key to ensuring the well-being of every member.

Note from the Author on this Article ‘Chigg’

The insights and guidance presented in this article stem from a blend of personal encounters with the EHCP review process and a deep-rooted professional understanding of CBH therapy. The author, having personally navigated the intricate maze of the EHCP/SEND process from its initiation to its ongoing stages, brings a unique perspective to the table. This hands-on experience is further enriched by a Diploma in Cognitive Behavioral Hypnotherapy from the esteemed UK College of Hypnosis and Hypnotherapy, and a certification in understanding Autism.

Before venturing into the realm of Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy, the author carved a successful career spanning over two decades in Investment Banking, with significant roles in global hubs like the City of London, Singapore, Frankfurt, and Zurich. This background, although seemingly distinct, instilled a passion for relaxation, self-hypnosis, and the art of simplifying complex problems.

Today, channeling this passion and expertise, the author has established the Bohangar City Practice. This venture is a testament to their commitment to assisting others through Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy, drawing from both their professional training and personal journey with SEND. This article, thus, stands as a credible and empathetic guide for parents embarking on or navigating the EHCP review process.

Disclaimer, Please Read: The information provided in this article is for illustrative and informational purposes only. It does not establish a therapist-patient relationship. For medical issues or emergencies, always consult with a licensed medical professional. For non-clinical challenges related to stress, anxiety, and other emotional or behavioural concerns, considering a consultation with a therapist may be beneficial. Bohangar City Practice is a registered Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy practice, specializing in combining cognitive behavioural techniques with hypnosis to address various challenges and promote well-being. Any questions, please do reach out

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Are you a Parent of a child with SEN? Are you struggling to cope?

Bespoke Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy for Parents struggling with SEN, EHCP, School, Local Authorities Maze


-Bohangar Practice –

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